Friday, May 23, 2008

A Book of Gaalis

My friend is going to write something called 'A Book of Gaalis'.

It is an indepth study on the ontogeny and phylogeny of 'Gaalis' and on how 'Gaalis' evolved from the Neanderthals to the Cro-Magnon to the Pleistocene to the Pre-Modern to the Modern to the Post-Modern to the Post-Post-Modern.

He says it is about the epistemology of 'cuss words' and examines the ever illuding relationship between 'Gaalis' and 'Gnosis'. Also, the humble attempt tries to interpret the ontological design behind the *being* and *becoming* of 'Gaalis'.

Heavily drawn upon concepts ranging from Heidegger's 'Dasein' and 'Throwness' to Marla Singer's 'Putness' to Michael Foucault's 'Hermeneutics of the Subject' to Julia Kristeva's 'Intersubjectivity', it tries to bringforth a framework to understand the ontology of 'Gaalis' and henceforth, the human condition(or the condition of being 'human').

He would like to extend his thanks to Prof.Jack Norton, Lucassian Professor of Philosophy,Economics & Drudgery & honorable Chair of the Saponify Center for Advanced Studies at Fincher School of Business, Ann Arbor and to Prof.Tyler Burden, Professor of Bio-Chemistry, Chair of Raymond.K.Hassel Center for Alternate Psychotheraphy at Palahniuk School of Medicine and co-founder of 'CounterCulture LLC' (private equity spinoff of Bukowski Corp., Bay Area, CA) for their constant support, guidance and inspiration. He would like to dedicate this book to them.

Since the author of the book is not contended with *mere* theoritical approaches, he has also tried to seamlessly move beyond the realm of *theories* and plunged into the spheres of practice as well. Each chapter has this no-holds-barred attempt on throwing "Gaalis' at his friends, relatives, the people they knew and other such losers. Watch out!

Excerpts from the book

Chaper 6

Do I give you the ass or the crotch? - A question of Etiquette
An Ontological Study

His name is Patel.
but people call him Pattu
and you can call him Pony boy.

he was the roomie
whose life I made miserable
and thus,
I became
the Rumi.

Pattu would be Jesus,.
if god had a really nasty sense of humour,,
or a tumour in the balls

Now. Cut-to-the-chase.

Pattu is a pig, ney he is a cow.
an ugly fat two headed cow.
You think that is a joke. NO . Pattu is a joke.
Pattu thinks bats are like cows,

Pussy cow Pattu


"I dont smaaake ... I only rooll"

"You knaaawwww.. in raichur it snows ...its sooooo caallllldd...
you have to wear eskimo suit all the time...
raichur is taller than the himalayas..."

"i cant waaaalk aaaand smaake man.,its naat good to waaalk and smaaake..."

"aaaaimmm a leoo.....leoos are lioooooooons...
I aaaaaaam naaaaaaaaat a GUUJJJU"

" if u daant smoke up u are no moore my fraand!
old time sake maan "

" capris are very cannning,,,very calculating,
you maaatherfaaaking capri"

" heeey machha,
chaaek aaaout maaah saaide baarns.
daaant i look jaaast like Sandy(Sandeep Shenoy)...
I aaam jaast laaaike hisss twaain saaaister"

"you pastard"

"aam naat draaank.....i caan draive ma baaaaaike...zzum bolke ..zup bolke..
naaonee caan drive faaster thaaan meee" (and a chic in scooty overtakes..)

" pleaaase daaaant hit me on the haaaeddd..
i daaant likee it...
it iss very soft and delicate
come macccchaaa give my haaedd some haeeed"

"You knoooowww.. in ramakrishna they milk the cows with music.
they plaay music cause their own calfs sing this music"

"Madrassi hogaaaa tera baap!!"

" You knowww ... its written on the road (the road next to 5th block going down to haunted house) that BEWARE HINDUS WE WILL KILL YOU ALLLLLL....
i swear i know perfect kannada.."



Releasing this July!

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